Category: Funerals (page 1 of 3)

What to wear to a funeral

Funerals are a time when we pay our respects to the dead. It’s important that you’re dressed appropriately and in black, though there is much flexibility with what color or style of clothing would suit your personal tastes best- bright colours can be very uplifting during this somber occasion!

This passage talks about how funerals have changed over recent years as more people look towards celebrations instead; traditionally reserved only for those who die young (or otherwise), these services allow everyone else also have their say so they do not feel left out leading up until an emotional goodbye afterwards where feelings may run high depending on circumstance.

If you are unsure of what to wear, it’s important to be respectful to the deceased. The family may set a specific dress code, or want you to wear a certain colour, so it’s always best to double check with them first.

Here is our guide for what to wear to a funeral:

What is appropriate clothing for a funeral?

Traditionally, funeral etiquette suggests men and women wear black clothing that’s conservative and respectful. Black or dark colours are most common, but some cultures expect mourners to wear a less traditional funeral colour. The weather and location of funeral services can also play a factor, so try and consider these elements before you decide what to wear.

If you are attending a celebration of life, woodland burial or a funeral in an alternative venue to a place of worship or crematorium, you may find that the family of the deceased are expecting a less formal attire for these occasions. They may request a less traditional dress or may have a personalised theme they would like you to adhere to.

What to wear to a funeral that is not black?

Wearing black to a funeral is generally acceptable across Western society. However, not all cultures consider black as the appropriate colour for a funeral. For instance, black is considered inappropriate at a Hindu funeral or Sikh funeral; instead, mourners (both male and female) are expected to wear white. Here are some other popular colours worn worldwide:

 

  • Red – in South Africa, red is sometimes worn as a colour of mourning. For a Ghanain funeral, it’s traditional for members of the community to wear black and white while the immediate family will wear red and black.
  • Purple – in Thailand, purple represents sorrow and is often worn by widows during the mourning period. Purple is also worn in Brazil alongside black.
  • Grey – in Papua New Guinea, a widow applies a stone-coloured clay to their skin while mourning their husband.
  • Bright colours – many African, Caribbean/West Indies, humanist and non-religious funerals in the UK and across the world will opt for more vibrant colours. Wearing bright colours to a funeral can reinforce the celebration of life.
  • Subdued colours like grey, maroon and navy blue can be a good alternative to black.

That being said, it’s best to speak to a family member regarding what they want you to wear.

How to plan the perfect funeral

When a loved one dies, it’s often difficult to know what to do. If you’re not sure where to start, here are some tips on how to plan the perfect funeral. By following these simple steps, you can make the process easier for yourself and your family. First, decide what type of service you want. There are many different options available, so choose the one that best suits your needs. Then, select a burial or cremation site and make arrangements with the funeral home. Finally, gather together any important documents and ensure that the deceased’s estate is in order. Planning a funeral can be challenging, but it’s important to remember that there is no right or wrong way to do it. By taking care of everything ahead of time

  • Plan the funeral in advance
  • Choose a location for the service
  • Find out what will happen during the ceremony
  • Write your eulogy to be read at the funeral
  • Select music that is appropriate for your loved one’s life and personality
  • Send invitations to friends and family members

Planning a funeral is one of the most difficult things someone can do in life. That’s why it’s important to take care of all the details so that loved ones are able to grieve without having prep too much on their plate for this final celebration of love. If you need help with your planning, contact us today! We have experts ready and waiting to help make sure every detail is perfect for your family member or friend who has passed away.

What are the Different Types of Coffins?

Traditional Coffin

The British coffin style provides a classic look, modest and traditional.

These are characterised by a flat top, the sarcophagus (coffin shaped) i.e. narrower at the head and toes than at the shoulders and simple fittings. They can be enhanced with raised lids and additional detailing on the side of the coffins called wreaths.

The lids are shallower than European styles but one of the styles we offer has a Double raised lid which gives a similar effect.

The coffins are made using oak veneers, which are laminated on to chipboard or medium density fibreboard (MDF). All are Forest Stewardship Council certified. They are approximately 80-85% wood and 10% Glue and rest moisture. A high proportion of the wood is from recycled wood. It’s pressed together with heat and glue a then a usable board is made, which is used to make our coffins.

The coffins are finished with a water based lacquer not solvent based. When it’s dry it’s completely biodegradable No other toxins are contained within the board, therefore, these coffins are suitable for burial or cremation.

When the coffin is cremated, as it’s mostly wood as the coffin burns it aids the process of cremation without any harmful emissions. The amount of CO2 released from the coffin during cremation is offset by the CO2 taken up during the life as a tree and can be considered carbon neutral.

If you’ re planning on a woodland burial please let us know, so we can use a suitable calico liner which will comply with regulations and be completely biodegradable.

Cardboard Coffin

In recent years cardboard coffins are becoming a very popular option. Seen as eco-friendly, modern and now using modern digital printing can be decorated in high-quality designs as varied as your imagination.

The coffins we supply have no fixings at all and the cardboard are folded in a way that the structure is maintained. The finished item is incredibly strong and can hold considerable weight. Our standard cardboard coffins will support a person of up 23 Stone. If the person is heavier we can do this with special provision, please let us know.

We supply coffins that are traditional coffin shaped (sarcophagus) i.e. narrower at the head and toes than at the shoulders and also Casket (rectangular) shaped – some customers prefer this shape, but this a purely personal choice.

We supply our coffins with strap fabric handles as standard – please let us know if you prefer not to have these.

If you don’t find something on our catalog that you like, please contact us and we can make a design specific to you.

Our fabric coffins have a rigid cardboard structure but then some with a decorated cover called a pall.

Natural Materials Coffin

The products that we don’t make in the UK are either manufactured by co-operative associations or are covered.

In recent years he has been a trend to move to more sustainable and natural material for coffins. They often have a softer look and feel and have no ‘ hard edges’ or corners and our coffins have no metal fixing and often ties and fixing are made with the materials itself. a fair trade agreement ensuring that all workers and suppliers are treated fairly and work in good and safe conditions.

In line with our strong green beliefs, all of our products are manufactured in the most environmentally friendly way. Our products are handmade from local materials grown and cropped in licensed plantations.

American Caskets

These stylish and beautifully made caskets are either made of solid wood or Steel sheet. They come fully finished with quality plush linings and include all fixtures and fittings that embellish the exterior of the caskets.

Most of these are suitable for burial only all these caskets are suitable for repatriation.

These Caskets, made in America by the same well-established manufacturer who provided caskets for John F Kennedy and Michael Jackson.

How to make your own order of service booklet

Order of service booklets are important for a variety of ceremonies, including weddings, funerals and christenings. The order of service provides a useful guide to the service, often containing words of songs, hymns or readings so guests can follow the ceremony more closely. Many people will retain the order of service from ceremonies so they have a memento of the day, so it is worthwhile to create a professional booklet and arranging for printing.

MAKING AN ORDER OF SERVICE BOOKLET

It is quite easy to make your order of service booklets with online templates and they provide a useful layout guide to help you format your booklets. Order of service booklets are usually A5 size. In general, the front cover of an order of service booklet contains important information about the date and time of the event, the venue and address and the name of the person. It is also a nice touch to add a photograph of the person to the front cover. You choose the typeface and size of font you wish to use on the front cover and will also need to decide whether you are printing your booklet in colour or in black and white.

Generally, order of services include:

  • details about the person or couple
  • a timeline of the day
  • a listing of close family members
  • details of location for the wedding reception or funeral wake
  • complete words for any hymns, readings or poems
  • a note to thank all guests for attending at the end of the booklet

It can also be very poignant to include a collection of photographs in your order of service booklet.

KEEP IT SIMPLE

It’s important to keep your order of service booklet as simple as possible as this makes it easier for guests to follow. Choosing an easy to read font helps make the text clear for all guests and creating a centred layout is also easy to follow. You can use bold or italic styles to make headings stand out, and adding a quote or poem to the back cover of your order of service booklet is a final touch that’s often forgotten.

What to say when someone dies

When somebody dies it can be difficult to know what to say. If someone has lost their mother, father, sibling or friend, it is normal to worry that we might offend them or make things worse, but it’s more hurtful to say nothing at all.

Here are a few things that you can do:

  • Acknowledge the person’s death
  • When you are searching for what to say when someone dies, don’t be afraid to state what a terrible thing it is to have happened. Do it in a way that feels natural.

  • Talk about the person that has died
  • One of the main things that people find difficult after someone dies is when no one talks about their loved one anymore. Sharing a memory and saying things like ‘they were so funny’, or ‘I remember this about her so clearly…’ can open up an opportunity for them to talk.

  • Express your own sadness
  • When someone dies it can leave many people feeling shell-shocked and sad. It’s okay to share your own feelings of sadness, but avoid implying to people closer to them that your feelings are the same.

  • Be empathetic
  • Regardless of how sad you’re feeling, or your own experiences of a loved one dying, you should never assume that someone who has been bereaved feels the same. Saying ‘I can’t imagine how it feels for you,’ acknowledges that their grief is unique, not that you don’t sympathise with them.

  • Accept anger
  • Don’t let fear of tears or anger hold you back from expressing words of sympathy. If a person is grieving after someone dies don’t try and explain or fix something that’s been taken badly. Just say sorry.

  • Keep in touch
  • After a funeral support can gradually – or suddenly – disappear, but the bereaved person is still grieving for their loved one. This can leave people feeling very isolated. Asking them ‘what’s life like now?’ and ‘how are you coping?’ can be really helpful.

Bereavement: How to navigate it

Bereavement is the state of sadness and mourning following the death of a family member. It is characterised by grief, which is the process and the range of emotions we go through as we process the loss.

When we lose someone close to us it can be emotionally devastating, and it is therefore natural to go through a range of physical and emotional processes as we come to terms with the loss. This process is unique for every individual who experiences it.

Whilst there is no simple formula for getting through a deep loss, this article will provide you with some tips for dealing with grief.

Expect some loneliness

The feeling of loneliness is completely normal however it is important not to get too isolated. When you are experience loss and grief make sure you reach out to people and support groups who understand what you are going through.

Be gentle with yourself

Try not to put pressure on yourself to feel better. Do not judge yourself for not “doing better” or “keeping it together”. Getting over a big loss takes time, you need to allow yourself this time to heal.

Embrace all emotions

We tend to have little control over our feelings, and they come and go whether we like it or not. It is important that you let them move through, like waves in the ocean. It does not mean that you are weak or abnormal if you feel these waves of emotion. If they are overwhelming you can practice mindfulness (e.g. by meditating) as this will help with emotional self-regulation. It is also important to know when to seek professional help.

Keep structure in your day

Set your alarm, get up, shower and have breakfast – this will automatically make you feel better. You do not have to leave the house but having some structure will help you mentally and physically at this hard time. Also try to eat small, regular meals, even if you are not hungry.

If you have any questions please give us a call, we will be happy to help. Call us on Freephone 08000936800 or email contact@buckleymemorials.com.

End of 2020 will see 1.6M funeral plans in force

By the end of 2020, it is estimated that there will be almost 1.6 million new funeral plans sold, according to recent research.

Market research consultancy, IRN Research, this week published the ‘Funeral Plans Consumer Research Report 2020’ which looks at the pre-paid funeral plan market and sets that into the context of how consumers pay for their funeral. It considers consumer use of funeral plans and other means they use to pay for their funeral, especially over50s insurance. It includes an assessment of the size of the market and its trends, and profiles of leading suppliers.

While the number has continued to rise in recent years, there has been a notable slowdown in growth in recent years. The number of new sales has declined steadily since 2016 mainly because of competition from over50s life insurance policies. Like the UK economy, the funeral plan market has faced a roller coaster year in 2020 because of COVID-19. As a result of COVID-19, net new sales in 2020 (gross sales less plans drawn down) are expected to be only around one-quarter of the number seen in 2019.

There are results from a nationally representative survey of 2,093 consumers exploring their understanding of funeral plans, and a survey of 196 consumers that have funeral plans. The funeral plan market is being reshaped today by a number of key factors, including:

  • COVID-19, leading to a significant rise in deaths in 2020 and possibly into 2021, thereby increasing the number of plans drawn down and making it harder for funeral directors to sell new plans.
  • Increasing competition from substitute products like over 50s life insurance and traditional life insurance.
  • The continued rise in funeral costs.
  • Proposed new FCA regulation of funeral plans, which will significantly raise costs for plan providers and possibly prevent some from selling new policies.

Dealing with funeral costs

If you arrange the funeral with a funeral director, you’re responsible for the costs. You should ask to see a price list before choosing a funeral, or explain how much you have to spend and see what services are possible.

The person who died might have paid for their funeral already. This is called a funeral plan. If you don’t know if there’s a funeral plan, you can:

  • check the will
  • ask the person’s close friends and relatives
  • ask local funeral directors

You might be able to get help paying for the funeral if you’re on benefits. Check if you can get a Funeral Expenses Payment on GOV.UK.

Getting a written estimate

Once you’ve chosen the funeral, you should be given a written estimate giving a breakdown of all of the costs involved. Ask for one if it’s not provided.

If you want to compare costs, you can contact other funeral directors, or ask someone else to help you with this.

Paying for the funeral

Some funeral directors might ask for a deposit before making the funeral arrangements.

You may be offered a discount to pay for the funeral before or soon after it takes place. If you know the money will be released at a later date to cover the cost, you might want to consider a bank loan or overdraft to pay early.

Money may be released later, if the person who has died made arrangements to pay for their funeral through an insurance or other policy, or if money is released after their estate has been dealt with.

If there is a legal claim for negligence against someone for the death, the cost of the funeral can be claimed as compensation.

Otherwise, you may agree payment by instalment, or pay after the legal process of dealing with the person’s estate has been settled.

Only 15 mourners allowed at wakes under new Covid rules – yet 30 can go to funerals

A new limit has been put on the number of people allowed to attend gatherings after funerals as Boris Johnson unveiled a three-tier lockdown system for England.

Only 15 mourners can attend a wake under the latest coronavirus rules.

Boris Johnson unveiled a new three-tier lockdown system, where areas across England will be labelled as ‘medium’, ‘high’ or ‘very high’ risk of coronavirus.

The new rules are suppose to “simplify and standardise our local rules”, the Prime Minister said, as well as stamping out the spread of the virus in areas where it is spiralling out of control.

But the fine print of the rules reveals a number of quirks in the system.

Funerals are permitted to go ahead with up to 30 mourners regardless of the Covid-19 alert level.

A report from the Mirror advises that:

The number allowed to attend a wake has been cut to 15 in Tier 1, Tier 2 and Tier 3 areas.

Government guidance did not previously include a 15-person limit on gatherings after a funeral service.

The existing social distancing rules continue to apply, such as keeping two metres apart and wearing a face covering indoors.

Wedding ceremonies can go ahead as long as there are no more than 15 guests

But receptions will be completely banned in areas in the strictest ‘Tier 3’ lockdown.

Most Popular Funeral Songs

Choosing funeral songs is often seen as an important part of personalising a funeral service for your loved one. It is a chance for you to pay tribute to their personality, their hobbies, or simply say farewell with one of their favourite songs.

Popular funeral songs

Some people choose live music for funerals, commemorating a person’s life with uplifting and happy songs. The choice is completely up to you, and depending on the rules of where the service is being held, there really is no right or wrong.

As funerals become more tailored to reflect the life of the person who has sadly passed away, families are opting for modern songs to be played at the service.

Here are some of the most popular funeral songs:

  • My Way – Frank Sinatra
  • Angels – Robbie Williams
  • The Best – Tina Turner
  • Wind Beneath My Wings – Bette Midler
  • Always Look on the Bright Side of Life – Eric Idle (Monty Python’s ‘Life of Brian’)
  • Time to Say Goodbye – Sarah Brightman and Andrea Bocelli
  • You’ll Never Walk Alone – Gerry and the Pacemakers
  • You Raise Me Up – Westlife
  • See You Again – Wiz Khalifa

Classical funeral music

Classical music remains a popular choice for funerals, setting the stage for an emotional and moving service. Many people opt for light classical music for funerals, whilst others may prefer a more dramatic piece which reflects the personality of their loved one.

Some of the most popular classical music for funerals include:

  • Canon in D – Paachelbel
  • Nimrod from Enigma Variations – Elgar
  • The Four Seasons – Vivaldi
  • Ave Maria – Schubert
  • Pie Jesu – Fauré
  • Adagio – Albinoni
  • Air on a G String – Bach
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