Category: Kerbstones

Only 15 mourners allowed at wakes under new Covid rules – yet 30 can go to funerals

A new limit has been put on the number of people allowed to attend gatherings after funerals as Boris Johnson unveiled a three-tier lockdown system for England.

Only 15 mourners can attend a wake under the latest coronavirus rules.

Boris Johnson unveiled a new three-tier lockdown system, where areas across England will be labelled as ‘medium’, ‘high’ or ‘very high’ risk of coronavirus.

The new rules are suppose to “simplify and standardise our local rules”, the Prime Minister said, as well as stamping out the spread of the virus in areas where it is spiralling out of control.

But the fine print of the rules reveals a number of quirks in the system.

Funerals are permitted to go ahead with up to 30 mourners regardless of the Covid-19 alert level.

A report from the Mirror advises that:

The number allowed to attend a wake has been cut to 15 in Tier 1, Tier 2 and Tier 3 areas.

Government guidance did not previously include a 15-person limit on gatherings after a funeral service.

The existing social distancing rules continue to apply, such as keeping two metres apart and wearing a face covering indoors.

Wedding ceremonies can go ahead as long as there are no more than 15 guests

But receptions will be completely banned in areas in the strictest ‘Tier 3’ lockdown.

Most Popular Funeral Songs

Choosing funeral songs is often seen as an important part of personalising a funeral service for your loved one. It is a chance for you to pay tribute to their personality, their hobbies, or simply say farewell with one of their favourite songs.

Popular funeral songs

Some people choose live music for funerals, commemorating a person’s life with uplifting and happy songs. The choice is completely up to you, and depending on the rules of where the service is being held, there really is no right or wrong.

As funerals become more tailored to reflect the life of the person who has sadly passed away, families are opting for modern songs to be played at the service.

Here are some of the most popular funeral songs:

  • My Way – Frank Sinatra
  • Angels – Robbie Williams
  • The Best – Tina Turner
  • Wind Beneath My Wings – Bette Midler
  • Always Look on the Bright Side of Life – Eric Idle (Monty Python’s ‘Life of Brian’)
  • Time to Say Goodbye – Sarah Brightman and Andrea Bocelli
  • You’ll Never Walk Alone – Gerry and the Pacemakers
  • You Raise Me Up – Westlife
  • See You Again – Wiz Khalifa

Classical funeral music

Classical music remains a popular choice for funerals, setting the stage for an emotional and moving service. Many people opt for light classical music for funerals, whilst others may prefer a more dramatic piece which reflects the personality of their loved one.

Some of the most popular classical music for funerals include:

  • Canon in D – Paachelbel
  • Nimrod from Enigma Variations – Elgar
  • The Four Seasons – Vivaldi
  • Ave Maria – Schubert
  • Pie Jesu – Fauré
  • Adagio – Albinoni
  • Air on a G String – Bach

Dealing with grief over the festive period

If you’ve lost a loved one, the festive season can feel like it’s lost its joy and meaning, becoming a particularly difficult time of year that is fraught with memories.

Christmas is meant to be a wonderful time of year, but if you’re coping with grief you may be feeling far from festive.

Whilst coping with a recent bereavement can be particularly difficult, even those that lost a loved one many years ago can find that their grief intensifies during the festive season.

Memories of past Christmases with those that have passed away can be very painful and leave you feeling little reason to celebrate.

We’ve put together a few ideas and advice about how to cope with grief over the festive season.

Only do as much as you’re comfortable with

Don’t feel pressured to do all the same things that you have in the past, or to attend big Christmas celebrations if you really don’t want to. Equally, if you still want to celebrate Christmas, don’t allow yourself to feel guilty for doing so.

Create traditions to remember your loved one at Christmas

Creating new Christmas traditions that pay tribute to the person that has passed can be a wonderful way of still including them in the holiday season. Here are a few ideas for new traditions to remember those that have passed at Christmas:

  • Visit their grave and lay down flowers on a set day during the festive season each year.
  • Make it a tradition to visit a place that was special to you both during the Christmas period.
  • Light a candle in their memory during your Christmas dinner.
  • Visit a place of worship and light a candle in their memory.
  • Share favourite stories about the person with your loved ones.

Plan ahead

It can take some of the stress out of the festive season to discuss Christmas plans with friends and family in plenty of time of the big day.

Be kind to yourself

Listen to and accept your grief as it comes, if you need to cry, allow yourself the time to cry. Don’t beat yourself up over not being in the festive spirit.

Whatever your plans for Christmas day, make sure you leave time to treat yourself, whether that’s with your favourite festive film, a packet of indulgent biscuits, or a brisk walk on Christmas morning.

How are our memorials installed and secured to NAMM standards?

When you buy a memorial for a loved one there is an expectation that it will stand in place as an elegant tribute to their memory for many years to come.

To withstand the test of time, all memorials should be made from the highest quality hardwearing materials and securely fixed to the ground to prevent them from falling or being pushed over.

Here at Buckley Memorials our Memorials are made to last by skilled craftsmen using the highest quality materials.

Members of NAMM and BRAMM

We are members of both the National Association of Memorial Masons (NAMM) and the British Register of Accredited Memorial Masons (BRAMM) and comply with both organisation’s set standards of quality. You can trust that our products will always be both long-lasting and durable.

NAMM-approved ground anchors

The British Standard for memorials, as set out in BS8415, states that for safety reasons, all memorials should be installed using secure ground anchors.

For your peace of mind and safety, here at Buckley Memorials we only use NAMM-approved ground anchorsto secure our memorials.

Headstones are attached to the base of the memorial using stainless steel dowels. We then anchor them to the ground using a two foot stainless steel bar which goes through the entire base and concrete foundation and then into the ground.

According to NAMM, there has been no historical evidence of any injuries occurring from correctly installed NAMM Accredited ground anchors since their first introduction.

We are so confident in the quality of our products that we offer a 100% customer satisfaction assurance and ‘peace of mind’ service. Browse our range of beautiful memorialsand get in touch with our team of experts if you have any questions about designs, materials or fixings.

A quick guide to maintaining a loved one’s grave

A loved one’s grave can be a comforting place for friends and family to visit to pay their respects, remember them, or simply sit and feel close to them again.

Memorial headstones and graves require regular cleaning and maintenance to keep them looking at their best. A well maintained grave can be a peaceful place to go to remember your loved one as well as a beautiful tribute to their memory.

Here is a quick guide to maintaining a headstone and grave.

Cleaning

If the grave has a headstone memorialthis is likely to be the main focal point and should be kept clean and unobstructed. Memorials come in a wide range of elegant designs and beautiful natural stones that should be looked after carefully.

When cleaning the headstone, it’s important to use a soft sponge and a gentle cleaning solution, a simple solution of warm water and washing up liquid should be effective at removing most dirt. Take care to only use mild and gentle cleaning solutions and never use acidic cleaning products as these could damage natural stone.

Brush or wipe way excess dirt before using your sponge and soapy water to gently wash the headstone. For headstones with inscriptions or detail, use a cotton bud to gently clean dirt from any narrow spaces. Finally, use a clean, dry cloth to buff the headstone and remove any streaks.

Weeding

Keep the grave looking neat, tidy, and well cared for with regular weeding and by trimming back any grass or overhanging plants.  You may wish to put down a layer of decorative stones or chippings to help keep weeds at bay.

Decorative items

Adding personal touches and decorative items to a grave can act as a tribute to the person’s character. To avoid disappointment, it’s best to check if the cemetery or burial ground has any rules, regulations or restrictions surrounding decorative items prior to buying anything.

Restoration

If you’ve cleaned and spruced the grave but it’s still looking a little sad, old, or rundown then it may be that the headstone requires professional renovation.

Get in touch with our team at Buckley Memorials by giving us a call for free on 0800 093 6800 to find out more about our memorial renovation service.

Organisations that offer support after a bereavement

No matter what the circumstances, dealing with the death of a loved one can be an excruciatingly painful, difficult, and confusing time.

Nobody should feel alone in their grief, and there are plenty of charities and organisations in the UK dedicated to supporting people after a bereavement.

Just some of the ways that these organisations may be able to help you include:

  • Guidance and support.
  • Telephone helpline.
  • Meet people going through the same thing.

We’ve put together some information about the top organisations.

Cruse Bereavement Care– The UK’s leading bereavement charity. Cruse provides advice and help to anyone in need of support after a bereavement. As well as a national helpline, Cruse also offer local services up and down the country including face-to-face support and groups.

Winston’s Wish– Helping children and young people to deal with the death of a parent or sibling.  Winston’s Wish offers children therapeutic help and support services to help them to deal with their grief. This includes professional support via a freephone helpline, online chat, email service and face-to-face.

Child Bereavement UK– Supports families when a baby or child passes away. As well as providing professional information and support to families, Child Bereavement UK also provide specialist support to bereaved children. Support can be gained via a telephone helpline, peer support groups, counselling, and online support.

Sands – Stillbirth and neonatal death charity– Supporting anyone who has been affected by the death of a baby. Sands offer information, advice and support through their website, app, freephone helpline, and local and online support groups.

Speaking to someone about your bereavement can help you to work through your feelings, get advice about how to cope with your grief, and help with adjusting to life without the person who has died.

Funeral Cost Controversy

The funeral industry is being put under the microscope due to the rising cost of even a basic funeral according to reports this month.

The cost of a funeral according to analysts has risen 3 times more than the rate of inflation in the last decade putting many families on low incomes under pressure to pay for all the aspects of laying loved ones to rest.

Sadly, there are cases where the deceased are held in mortuaries for months at a time while family members try to get enough money together to pay for a funeral. This leaves an unacceptable number of people in limbo at a time when grieving for a lost loved one is hard enough.

The average cost of a funeral in the UK is between £3000 and £5000 which is a substantial sum of money for someone on a low wage with little in the way of money put by.

Funeral directors have blamed local councils for increasing the cost while competition watchdogs are looking to see if lack of coemption in the industry is responsible for pushing up prices.

As with any other service, it is important to look around for the best price if possible, to ensure value for money and you are not paying more than you should be to give your loved on the send-off they deserve.

What is a Kerbstone?

It’s a question the majority of the British public wouldn’t be able to answer if asked on the street. Simply put, the definition of ‘kerb’ is a line of stone or concrete forming an edge between a pavement and a roadway, from Old French courbe (bent).

If you have been to a cemetery, it is likely that you have seen a handful of kerbstones elegantly marking the gravesite of someone. Kerb surrounds, as we call them at Buckley Memorials, are one of the options available for enclosing either a grave or cremation plot. We can make a kerb surround to fit almost any memorial where cemetery regulations allow their installation.

There are a variety of the types of Kerb surrounds; options include a cover slab in the same material as the surround and memorial stone, providing a truly maintenance free alternative to traditional burial sites. Kerbs come in a variety of stone or marble, with a wide selection of colours and additional accessories can be added like vases, crosses and statues. Marble Kerbsets can be used in place of granite because it looks stunningly beautiful in white, particularly on a sunny day.

Traditional surrounds cover the entire grave site and can be custom built depending on the surface size and are available in a variety of colours, designs and materials. Many Kerbs appear to be cut from one massive piece of stone, but are actually several different pieces that are fitted together seamlessly. The inside of the surround can be filled in with chippings, or left open for planting, which makes for a truly lovely and tranquil place of rest.

Let Buckley Memorial talk you through our full line of Kerb sets. It is important to note that a permit application must be submitted to the Cemetery or Churchyard before a memorial can be erected. There is normally a charge for this, and one of our Sales Advisors will make enquiries on your behalf as to what these fees may be.

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